Project Runway All-Stars Episode 12: Finale Part 2

So PRAS is over and the final runway came down to the last three boys standing: Austin, Mondo and Michael C. But in a surprise twist, Gretchen from Season 8 swooped in and somehow managed to win the whole show, even though no one likes her and she wasn't even competing! How weird is that??

No, she didn't. But if she had, I could not have possibly have been more outraged about it than I already was when she did that in her own season. Gretchen beat Mondo? Seriously? How did that even HAPPEN?

But thankfully Mondo has finally been vindicated and everyone agrees that he is the prettiest boy in the room and everyone loves him. Hooray!

I did feel a *little* bad for Austin since he did such a great job but honestly, he did pretty well considering that he came from a season in which people barely made sleeves throughout the competition because they didn't know how! Mondo and Michael represented a season in which the competition was MUCH stiffer.

Okay, speaking of stiffer, are Mondo and Michael a couple? I'd been avoiding thinking about it because it's just too much gushy crying to contemplate (Can you picture those two watching a long distance calling plan commercial together? They'd be inconsolable!) but in the final episode they did seem like more than just co-dependent friends. And did Mondo say to Michael something like "wait to we tell Mom"? I'm confused. Isn't Mondo's mom dead and Michael's mom disowned him? Now in my head I'm picturing them as a couple and Michael's mom has reconciled with him because now she has Mondo, the son she always wanted.

But in any case, it's pretty obvious that the right guy won. And good for Michael for hanging on as long as he did. As for Austin, maybe he'll do another season of On the Road with Austin & Santino (fingers crossed!!).

Fashion Star--Season 1, Episode 2--Who's Your Customer?

It's Project Runway--without the project, and with WAY more runway. It's just all runway.


It's Week Two of Fashion Star and I continue to not quite "get" this show. I thought half of them went home last week, which was confusing because at that rate the whole season could last a month. But now they're all back this week, so that's even more confusing. What exactly is the end goal here? I'm so confused.

It's like they all decided that the "runway" was the best part of Project Runway, so they REALLY focused on that and kept everything else to a minimum. The runway show itself is at least 75% of the show. And the stage has so many bells and whistles (and giant TV screens) that it reminds me of The Running Man. But everything else--behind the scenes, interpersonal drama, judges/mentors input, designer back stories, even just explaining the concept of the show--all of it is condensed into two minute montages. Is that enough? Obviously not for me because I have no idea what's going on.




Okay, so maybe I'm just not paying attention. Then again, maybe the reason I'm not paying attention is because this show isn't that great. I'll keep watching, but I can't promise to care.

One thing I do know for sure is that I'm not the only person who thinks Oscar Fierro might sleep in a baby crib, just for funsies. Jessica Simpson revealed having a dream in which she gave birth to him and changed his diapers. What was Oscar's reaction? Was he repulsed or excited? I couldn't tell.



So to recap: Some of the designers got orders. Some did not. What does that mean for next week? Uh...nothing? I'm not sure. Apparently Oscar is going home. Hmm, that's a shame.

Project Runway All-Stars Episode 11: Finale Part 1

In Which We Learn that Joanna Coles Doesn't Do Home Visits for NUTHIN'

So it's down to the final three and we're all waiting to see the "All Star" collections. Unfortunately, Angela has a little news for the designers. There will be no taking a few months to design a collection, there will be no home visits a la Tim Gunn, there will be no waiting until Fashion Week to find out who wins. No, they all have just four days--count 'em, FOUR--to design and present a mini collection of five looks. And they can visit with Joanna at her workspace, aka the Marie Claire offices.

From the designers lack of fake surprise, I suspect they already knew most of this. Maybe I was supposed to have known it all along too, but just wasn't paying attention. I was probably distracted by Angela's lisp. Either way, these boys had better get a move on.


Above: Mondo looking serious. Very, very serious. My partner Mike saw this picture and he said, "It's like the worst heist movie." To which I replied, "Or the BEST heist movie!" I would go see that movie in a heartbeat.

The Three Gayskateers (no?) get packed up and head over to the high rise in the sky known as Joanna Coles office. After being made to wait (though if you saw the shoes she was wearing it may not have been intentional, she might have just needed the extra twenty minutes to make it down the hall) Austin, Mondo and Michael are allowed to ask a few questions (this time NOT bra-related).

Above: Notice anything about the Marie Claire cover in JOANNA "WHERE'S THE BRA?"COLES' office? Yeah, that's right. The model--presumably dressed by Joanna Coles--IS NOT WEARING A BRA. Of course she isn't. Women in high fashion photo shoots don't often wear bras. Or if they do, they wear complicated "versions" of bras that involve sticky tape and creative straps. Sure, we all prefer to wear bras and for some of us they're a must, but Joanna Coles has GOT to get over this. It can't be the ONLY question she asks designers! It's like critiquing a shoe designer by ONLY asking, "Can she run in them?"

Now it's time to sketch, shop and begin work.

Michael is inspired by the greenness of nature and his own desire to make sure everybody likes him. I think Michael has some serious Mommy issues. Whenever he's around a strong female he just obsesses over how to make sure she likes him. He spends most of the episode debating whether his collection will make Angela, Joanna, Georgina, his models and his Surrogate Fashion Mommy Diane von Furstenberg happy.

Above: Michael, seen here with his imaginary friend, Every Woman He's Ever Met Who Will Validate Him and Tell Him He's a Good, Good Boy

Austin just wants to be a pretty, pretty lady. There's just never enough tuille and hair spray for Austin Scarlett and I'm just fine with that.

Above: One for the model, one for me, one for the model, one for me...

Mondo, on the other hand, is having none of it. He's gone into a full-on Mondo Snit complete with tears, self-doubt, anger that people have such high expectations of him in the first place, and finally a flat out refusal to even do any work because he doesn't want to bother to "waste his time." In other words, an exaggerated version of how he behaves in every challenge. Eventually he'll find inspiration in his own turmoil (like he always does) and design a collection around the theme of "craziness" that will be brilliant but will look exactly like everything else he's designed in the past, so why did he need to freak out in the first place? Mondo is all of the things people associate with the "tempermental artist" personality. He's probably the most interesting and talented of the three but he's got a process and he rarely varies it (the process being, "freakout, breakdown, regroup, work, win"). Meanwhile, he finds time to make fun of Michael for being too emotional and Austin for being too queeny. Riiiiiiiight.

Above: Georgina Chapman explains the key to freaking out is...not.

All three of the designers, even Mondo, do feel a little better after a brief visit from Georgina Chapman. She explains how she used to be prone to torturous self-doubt and freakouts, to the point that she was afraid that if she didn't have a meltdown she wouldn't be as creative. But she also learned to control herself by, well, not freaking out. It's a good thing they got this advice from her. I don't think Isaac Mizrahi could have even gotten the words out without erupting in a hissy fit. That man is never more than a few breaths away from a freakout. 

Above: Isaac, looking as composed as he can manage.

As anyone who has ever watched Project Runway (or been a contestant) knows, you can't have a final challenge without two things: "unexpected" helpers in the form of past contestants and some sort of twist (that almost always involves adding another piece at the last minute). So when the past "all-stars" came in, no one was surprised. 

Above: What in the hell is Sweet P wearing?!?

What was surprising was that no one picked Rami to be their assistant! Mondo had first pick and he chose Mila. Okay, not a terrible choice since she has great construction skills and does a lot of colour blocking, which means she's good at adding fabrics together without making them bunchy or having the seams look ugly, definitely a plus for Mondo's designs. Plus, she's not to gossipy or emotional so you don't have to babysit her while you're trying to work. Solid choice.

Above: Mila, willing Mondo not to make her touch colourful fabric. If there's neon she'll scream.

Then Mondo lets Austin choose next. Pick Rami! Nope, he picks ANTHONY! Why? Austin starts telling him about historical dress and Hasidic menswear and poor Anthony is nodding like an idiot. All Anthony wants is a little more airtime and here he is, being expected to know stuff? It's just too much for poor Anthony.

Above: Austin and his baffling choice of assistants, Anthony.

Finally Michael gets his pick. Yay! Rami is still available! He's great at draping and is one of the best talents of the bunch. Yet Michael picks...April. WHAT? I know they're pals, but...uh...WHAT? Don't you want someone who's fast and good and .... sigh. Nope, he just wants to have lunch with his pal. I give up.

Above:  Even April doesn't understand why she's been picked. She had theatre tickets that night and everything.

The rest of the episode just showed some of the work that went in to the designs, but didn't reveal too much about the clothes themselves. We won't get to see those until next week when we see the final runway. But here are a few behind-the-scenes pictures and a couple of sneak peaks:


Above: Austin's work in progress





Above: Michael working on something for his "safari adventure" collection.



Above: I'm hoping this looks better when it's done. By definition it would have to.


Above: Mondo moping that Austin always gets what he wants (probably because he says what he wants while Mondo mopes and says nothing)




Above: Why don't *I* have a table with a sparkly silver shoe centrepiece??




A Sneak Peak:

Austin Scarlett (I know he loves the Little Bo Peep hair, but if you took that away it's a dress I could see a lot of women wearing)


Michael Costello (do you think he just looked at a picture of Diane von Fursentberg when he styled his model?)


Mondo Guerra (I like the giant sperm on her skirt!)

We'll have to wait until next week to see the runway show and find out who will win. Predictions? For me, I think that Mondo is the only one of the three who was really "robbed" in his season, so I'd like to see him win. I guess we'll find out next week!

UPDATE: A reader asked what shoes Joanna Coles was wearing in her office when the designers went to see her. I believe they are United Nude's Black Frame Triangle Heels from 2010 (only $498, or half my rent!):

I saw this on FashionBombDaily.com http://fashionbombdaily.com/2010/05/17/shoe-lust-united-nudes-black-frame-triangle-heel/

(If you're watching the episode online, it's at the 5:48 mark when you see Joanna walking down the hall.)

Thanks Peggy!

Fashion Star--Season 1, Episode 1--Pilot

Fashion Star: Is it worth it?



So I watched the series premiere of Fashion Star and I'm not sure what to think. It has some cool ideas, like having buyers from major retailers onstage to give instant feedback in the form of monetary offers to the designers. On the other hand, it has a lot of flash. A lot. Maybe too much.

As I was watching it I described it as "going to a planetarium during a light show." It still has some cool stuff, being a planetarium and all, but it's hard to see the constellations with all the smoke and lasers and marijuana smell. At this point my partner Mike laughed at me for saying "it's still cool, like a planetarium" because I'm that kind of nerd.

Okay, I've never really been to a planetarium, but I am kind of a nerd about fashion-based reality shows. Project Runway is obviously the benchmark and the rest are just various kinds of knock-offs. The question is, will this one be worth the trouble? Well, it's on CTV.ca so I won't have trouble finding episodes, so let's give it a go.

The main premise of the show seems to be as follows:

Host Elle McPherson gets designers to present their designs in a flashy runway show in front of the judges (Jessica Simpson, Nicole Ritchie and that other guy) and buyers from Macy's, Saks Fifth Avenue and H&M. If the buyers like the looks, they make an offer. The highest bid will then carry the designs in their store, which will be available the next day. If no one makes an offer then the designer is up for elimination. Later, the judges have to decide who, of the losing designers, stays and who goes home.

In the first episode, it seemed like a whole bunch of designers went home and only one was saved (we'll talk about him in a minute) so I'm not sure what's going to happen next week. At this rate, the series could be over in three episodes.

Ultimately the winner is supposed to win a contract worth $6 million that includes being carried in all three stores, a prize that apparently none of the judges even have. Gee, I wonder why that could be? Could it be because their judges (or "mentors") are really just models or pop starlets (or whatever the hell Nicole Ritchie is) who have vanity lines and aren't real designers?

Fashion Star is to Project Runway what American Idol is to The Voice. It's flashier, showier, more likely to have actual fireworks at any given moment, and has "mentors" who everyone has heard of but whose credentials are iffy at best. Want to know how to really make it in the music industry? Why not ask Cee-Lo? He did have that one novelty song that was a medium-to-big hit, that one time. Want to know how to be a real fashion designer? Clearly you should ask Nicole Ritchie. Why wouldn't you?

But none of that matters because the real star of Fashion Star is Oscar Fierra. The pint-sized designer seems to made up entirely of flamboyance and the ability to always find his light. He may not be able to design very well, but who cares? He "reality shows" extremely well. That's right, if "reality show" were a verb, Oscar would be reality showing at an advanced level.



But there is one thing about Oscar that intrigues me (confuses me...traumatizes me...) more than anything else. If you didn't notice this in the first viewing of this show, you must go back and rewatch it. Skip to the part where they do Oscar's home visit. Did you see it? No, it's not the wall of colourful hats. Not the room of doll-sized ball gowns that he seems to making just for himself. Nope, not the miniature pony he rides around town so he can feel like a giant. No, it's the crib. That's right. The crib.

For some reason, Oscar has a baby crib in his room next to the bed. Now I know it's a crib because it's almost identical to my daughter's crib. And I also know that Oscar doesn't have kids in his house. He does have dogs. Do the dogs sleep in the crib? Maybe. Or maybe...

That's right. I'm suggesting that it's possible that Fashion Star's Oscar Fierro has some strange fetish and sometimes sleeps in a crib. Do I know this for a fact? No, of course not. But I have so many questions...

Project Runway All-Stars Episode 10: Let's Get Down to Business

It's down to the final four and the designers are tasked with creating a commercial look that can be manufactured (locally) on a budget. It was interesting to see how a coat that retails for $500 only has about $65 in the budget for fabric. Wow, those manufacturing costs and markups really add up!



Despite a few minor snipes back and forth between Kenley and Mondo, the designers seem to be moving along smoothly. Of course, their workroom visits are coming up so they'll all have to explain to Joanna Coles exactly what kind of bra you can wear with each of their looks. It's sometimes literally her only question.


Kenley Collins
I've never disliked Kenley's designs, and I don't dislike this either. But the other designers have pointed out that she never seems to take the time to line up her patterns along the seam lines, but she doesn't make them so "unlined up" that it looks intentional either. So overall it looks a little cheaper than she probably means it to. I think she expects her great prints to speak for themselves sometimes but I know she can do better.



Michael Costello
I'm not sure why Michael isn't criticized as much as Kenley is for making the same dress over and over again. It's nice and I would wear it if I had the height and shape to pull it off, but what would a runway show of his look like? It would look like Mrs. Roper from Three's Company was having a dozen hot models try on her clothes for her.



Mondo Guerra
Do you ever feel like Mondo's models aren't cool enough to wear his clothes? I love everything Mondo's ever done and I hope he wins, but this model looks like a mom in an early 80's laundry soap commercial who has stumbled into her modern daughter's wardrobe. I don't know. Maybe it's the beige hair and beige shoes.



Austin Scarlett
Another case of a model looking crappy in an otherwise great garment. I love the colour and the silhouette, but it fits oddly. The arms are too short, the hemline's a tad high, and the fit in the shoulders seems odd to me. Oh my god, Austin made this for HIMSELF, didn't he?

So in the end, the final three are Mondo (the winner--hooray!), Austin and Michael. As a fan, there is something very satisfying about seeing the three contestants whose personalities I found the most endearing making it all the way to the finals. Oh gee, you don't think the producers knew that, do you? No, couldn't be. Although it does make me think of Elisa's exit interview in which she said that Austin Scarlett should win, not because of his designs, but because it would make the best overall narrative. Hmm...

Project Runway All-Stars Episode 9: When I Get My Dress in Lights

Lights, Camera, Are You Kidding Me?

This week's episode was the sort of silliness that previous episodes of Project Runway would have made fun of. The designers had to literally incorporate lights--actual LIGHTS--into their looks and then show them on a black-lit runway. Oh for god's sake, really? REALLY? My only hope is that Isaac accuses the designs of being "too costume-y."


Here's Angela trying to pretend like designers have to incorporate lights and glow sticks into their designs all the time. Yeah, it's totally normal and not at all stupid.


Austin is excited about the lights challenge. VERY excited.


The Runway

Austin Scarlett
Well, good for Austin for basically making an Austin dress that had a little lighting effect, like if the Austin Scarlett woman was in a weird sci-fi movie. But I think the real star here was Austin's face when he found out about the challenge. As Joel McHale said, "it blew his feeble mind."



Jerrell Scott
Jerrell always talks a good game (almost like he wants to be a reality TV star, huh?) but his taste is just never there. Granted, this was a ridiculous challenge that couldn't possibly bring out the best taste in anyone, yet Jerrell still found a way to let it bring out his worst. But maybe I'm missing something. Maybe I just don't realize how many women who wear giant lights on their heads, faces, boobs and hips are actually quite shy and conservative and feel the need to wear bulky long sleeves and maxi skirts to their ankles. It might be a niche market. You know, for Amish ravers.



Kenley Collins
This might be my favourite look that Kenley has ever done. Is that a good thing? I'm not sure anymore.



Michael Costello
It's interesting that he went with a sort of samurai inspiration, but was that on purpose? I can never tell with Michael.



Mondo Guerra
Mondo likes to be the weirdest guy in the room and he likes his designs to be quirky and odd. So when you throw in a bunch of lights and suddenly EVERYONE is being weird and quirky, it kind of throws him. It's like he couldn't "out-quirky" the quirkiness of the challenge. All in all, it looks like Puss 'n Boots went to Vegas to get into a cage match.


The Results:
Austin's was the least stupid so it won. Jerrell's was the most stupid so it lost. That's really what it came down to. But secretly I did love Kenley's.