Project Runway All-Stars Episode 11: Finale Part 1

In Which We Learn that Joanna Coles Doesn't Do Home Visits for NUTHIN'

So it's down to the final three and we're all waiting to see the "All Star" collections. Unfortunately, Angela has a little news for the designers. There will be no taking a few months to design a collection, there will be no home visits a la Tim Gunn, there will be no waiting until Fashion Week to find out who wins. No, they all have just four days--count 'em, FOUR--to design and present a mini collection of five looks. And they can visit with Joanna at her workspace, aka the Marie Claire offices.

From the designers lack of fake surprise, I suspect they already knew most of this. Maybe I was supposed to have known it all along too, but just wasn't paying attention. I was probably distracted by Angela's lisp. Either way, these boys had better get a move on.


Above: Mondo looking serious. Very, very serious. My partner Mike saw this picture and he said, "It's like the worst heist movie." To which I replied, "Or the BEST heist movie!" I would go see that movie in a heartbeat.

The Three Gayskateers (no?) get packed up and head over to the high rise in the sky known as Joanna Coles office. After being made to wait (though if you saw the shoes she was wearing it may not have been intentional, she might have just needed the extra twenty minutes to make it down the hall) Austin, Mondo and Michael are allowed to ask a few questions (this time NOT bra-related).

Above: Notice anything about the Marie Claire cover in JOANNA "WHERE'S THE BRA?"COLES' office? Yeah, that's right. The model--presumably dressed by Joanna Coles--IS NOT WEARING A BRA. Of course she isn't. Women in high fashion photo shoots don't often wear bras. Or if they do, they wear complicated "versions" of bras that involve sticky tape and creative straps. Sure, we all prefer to wear bras and for some of us they're a must, but Joanna Coles has GOT to get over this. It can't be the ONLY question she asks designers! It's like critiquing a shoe designer by ONLY asking, "Can she run in them?"

Now it's time to sketch, shop and begin work.

Michael is inspired by the greenness of nature and his own desire to make sure everybody likes him. I think Michael has some serious Mommy issues. Whenever he's around a strong female he just obsesses over how to make sure she likes him. He spends most of the episode debating whether his collection will make Angela, Joanna, Georgina, his models and his Surrogate Fashion Mommy Diane von Furstenberg happy.

Above: Michael, seen here with his imaginary friend, Every Woman He's Ever Met Who Will Validate Him and Tell Him He's a Good, Good Boy

Austin just wants to be a pretty, pretty lady. There's just never enough tuille and hair spray for Austin Scarlett and I'm just fine with that.

Above: One for the model, one for me, one for the model, one for me...

Mondo, on the other hand, is having none of it. He's gone into a full-on Mondo Snit complete with tears, self-doubt, anger that people have such high expectations of him in the first place, and finally a flat out refusal to even do any work because he doesn't want to bother to "waste his time." In other words, an exaggerated version of how he behaves in every challenge. Eventually he'll find inspiration in his own turmoil (like he always does) and design a collection around the theme of "craziness" that will be brilliant but will look exactly like everything else he's designed in the past, so why did he need to freak out in the first place? Mondo is all of the things people associate with the "tempermental artist" personality. He's probably the most interesting and talented of the three but he's got a process and he rarely varies it (the process being, "freakout, breakdown, regroup, work, win"). Meanwhile, he finds time to make fun of Michael for being too emotional and Austin for being too queeny. Riiiiiiiight.

Above: Georgina Chapman explains the key to freaking out is...not.

All three of the designers, even Mondo, do feel a little better after a brief visit from Georgina Chapman. She explains how she used to be prone to torturous self-doubt and freakouts, to the point that she was afraid that if she didn't have a meltdown she wouldn't be as creative. But she also learned to control herself by, well, not freaking out. It's a good thing they got this advice from her. I don't think Isaac Mizrahi could have even gotten the words out without erupting in a hissy fit. That man is never more than a few breaths away from a freakout. 

Above: Isaac, looking as composed as he can manage.

As anyone who has ever watched Project Runway (or been a contestant) knows, you can't have a final challenge without two things: "unexpected" helpers in the form of past contestants and some sort of twist (that almost always involves adding another piece at the last minute). So when the past "all-stars" came in, no one was surprised. 

Above: What in the hell is Sweet P wearing?!?

What was surprising was that no one picked Rami to be their assistant! Mondo had first pick and he chose Mila. Okay, not a terrible choice since she has great construction skills and does a lot of colour blocking, which means she's good at adding fabrics together without making them bunchy or having the seams look ugly, definitely a plus for Mondo's designs. Plus, she's not to gossipy or emotional so you don't have to babysit her while you're trying to work. Solid choice.

Above: Mila, willing Mondo not to make her touch colourful fabric. If there's neon she'll scream.

Then Mondo lets Austin choose next. Pick Rami! Nope, he picks ANTHONY! Why? Austin starts telling him about historical dress and Hasidic menswear and poor Anthony is nodding like an idiot. All Anthony wants is a little more airtime and here he is, being expected to know stuff? It's just too much for poor Anthony.

Above: Austin and his baffling choice of assistants, Anthony.

Finally Michael gets his pick. Yay! Rami is still available! He's great at draping and is one of the best talents of the bunch. Yet Michael picks...April. WHAT? I know they're pals, but...uh...WHAT? Don't you want someone who's fast and good and .... sigh. Nope, he just wants to have lunch with his pal. I give up.

Above:  Even April doesn't understand why she's been picked. She had theatre tickets that night and everything.

The rest of the episode just showed some of the work that went in to the designs, but didn't reveal too much about the clothes themselves. We won't get to see those until next week when we see the final runway. But here are a few behind-the-scenes pictures and a couple of sneak peaks:


Above: Austin's work in progress





Above: Michael working on something for his "safari adventure" collection.



Above: I'm hoping this looks better when it's done. By definition it would have to.


Above: Mondo moping that Austin always gets what he wants (probably because he says what he wants while Mondo mopes and says nothing)




Above: Why don't *I* have a table with a sparkly silver shoe centrepiece??




A Sneak Peak:

Austin Scarlett (I know he loves the Little Bo Peep hair, but if you took that away it's a dress I could see a lot of women wearing)


Michael Costello (do you think he just looked at a picture of Diane von Fursentberg when he styled his model?)


Mondo Guerra (I like the giant sperm on her skirt!)

We'll have to wait until next week to see the runway show and find out who will win. Predictions? For me, I think that Mondo is the only one of the three who was really "robbed" in his season, so I'd like to see him win. I guess we'll find out next week!

UPDATE: A reader asked what shoes Joanna Coles was wearing in her office when the designers went to see her. I believe they are United Nude's Black Frame Triangle Heels from 2010 (only $498, or half my rent!):

I saw this on FashionBombDaily.com http://fashionbombdaily.com/2010/05/17/shoe-lust-united-nudes-black-frame-triangle-heel/

(If you're watching the episode online, it's at the 5:48 mark when you see Joanna walking down the hall.)

Thanks Peggy!